Destilicious

  Hey, today I’m gonna talk about my new hobby, at least I find it interesting. This morning I had to wake up at 2 and drive my mom to the tourism company for her 4-day trip to the middle area of Vietnam. And before she went on her holiday, she had told me to take care of her garden. I was busy thinking about my works so I didn’t actually pay attention to what she had instructed. To be honest, I even felt irritating, what a bad kid I was. But it doesn’t matter since I’m okay with gardening, I’m okay with her proxy. And today, I went up to the terrace of my house, I enjoyed the sunlight. Gotta say that it was really hot but I felt calm, I think that’s a good thing to do since I stayed inside of the house for nearly a week. I need some vitamin D. And then I went to the foam box filled with water, I took the plastic water ladle and take out the water from the large foam box to water the vegetables. Every single drop of water pouring down to those shiny green leaves and brought me r...

  What is the fucking wrong with you Des? Don't fucking blame people for your mistakes.  If you can not control your fucking stress, don't mistreat other people.  Yeah I understand you are undergoing stress, a severe one. And I keep encouraging you to go somewhere alone for yourself and have a real convo with your fucking self. I did tell you to stop harassing people but you don't listen. Give me a moment please. I need to work with it. I need to solve it. I need to run really. I need to push myself to the limit. There needs to be a way for me to let everything out. I can't stand it. I'm going crazy. I truly don't understand why stress keeps hitting me continually like a sudden never-ending rainfall. I thought it was cyclical but not. Recently it has lasted for nearly a month and it's driving me mad. It has lasted for too fucking long.  And I scarcely control my anger or maintain my composure toward anyone. I can not hold my ego down like I used to be able o...

  Today I watched the notorious Fatal Attraction (1987) starring Glenn Close and Michael Douglas. The movie is that same kind of erotic thriller which was quite popular back to the day. In these movies, sex is always the main drive of crime and obviously we have seen so many men and women on screen recreated all the scariest incidents happened by the loss of control of some psychopaths.  I was one of them. If you want to know about my past love story, I'm happy to tell and admit that I was a psychopath. I was really mad and out of control. I tortured my ex lover every night and I didn't care about the consequences I would face in the near future. I haunted her like a ghost crying everyday asking for a reconciliation. So pathetic I was. Watching Fatal Attraction, I felt like I was seeing a bad joke on myself which is so sardonic. I can't believe I did behave the same way as Alex did. I was like out of my mind and made a fool of myself. I totally understand the borderline p...