Skip to main content

City girl


 

It was a tough Valentine's day you know, I had to travel a lot but it was cool, to be honest, I did something new, which is the most important thing in this journey of finding myself. What does that mean by finding myself anyway?

Riding my bike, the stream of thoughts encompassed my mind, forcing me to solve the quest of human psychology, from the lifestyle behavior of my old boss, my friends and acquaintances to how I was born and raised in this glamorous city of classes. The elements that form the combination of this girl I am were assembled through a developing process of family background, education and by chance, people I have met up with. 

I winded up thinking about this matter when a flash of memories crossed my mind, on my way of getting closer to the nature embracing me all the time without my recognition. I wonder, why mother earth always favors earthy souls and brings them to me, a city girl fueled by the hustle and bustle of a distressful glitzy world. I can't deny that I was raised that way, a big discrepancy from people I made friend with. I'm obsessed with the city lights and skyscrapers, I grew up with Western culture inspiring my teenage world with movies and entertainment magazines, how I always end up with rural kids, I don't know how, but I'm okay with it since they have taught me a lot of things about nature, plants, flowers, entities with a puff of tranquil wind filling the air. Crazy huh?

I remember back to the day, when I was younger, my dad worked for a company specializing in oil and gas named PTSC and people always claims doing a career in this field will make you rich, but honestly I didn't know what rich was back then, I was simply never rich and never thought of my family being rich, just a very mediocre family in Vung Tau city. I didn't go out much, I was a quiet kid, so I didn't have friends when I was under 18 backward. Those years, eating my mom's foods was a daily routine and eating out was something very strange and abnormal, so I didn't have that experience of eating out, especially in food vendors. When we ate out, it must be a very special occasion and we would go to a restaurant with well served foods and drinks. After moving to another city, HCMC, I made new friends and for the first time in my life, I had known the taste of so many street foods which I was not familiar with, that time, they thought I was a princess or simply a liar for attention (since they had never seen anyone like me, a girl who knew nothing, even the simplest thing like passing the road). And I bet that time they had never known of anything like prom night either, but my high school organizes that party every year, kind of novelty for those rural kids to comprehend. 

I didn't know to control any vehicles. My parents took me to schools 12 years long, first by motorbike then by car. I didn't show off when I was in university, once again I must say that I never think I'm a rich kid, my family is very medium, but I didn't understand why my university's friends always think I'm rich. Now I got it, but I will not talk so much about the reason today, it's late enough though. 

I just feel a lil funny because a city girl like me could draw the attention of earthy souls and gather them together to nurture me, to water me until I have grown fully into a big tree like I am today. Spontaneously, I thought of a different scenario, if I hadn't met them, if I had been an outgoing kid back to the day and I had met up with people of my class, would I have become the person I am today? Of course, no. That's how everything functions. 

Anyway, I'm not going to change myself. I am a city girl and I'm discovering the world in my way. I can't be a rural girl and try to copy their lifestyles, it's just so wrong because living rural is not me. At least for this moment.

 I think I need to hit the bed now. See ya!


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

I'm going crazy

  What is the fucking wrong with you Des? Don't fucking blame people for your mistakes.  If you can not control your fucking stress, don't mistreat other people.  Yeah I understand you are undergoing stress, a severe one. And I keep encouraging you to go somewhere alone for yourself and have a real convo with your fucking self. I did tell you to stop harassing people but you don't listen. Give me a moment please. I need to work with it. I need to solve it. I need to run really. I need to push myself to the limit. There needs to be a way for me to let everything out. I can't stand it. I'm going crazy. I truly don't understand why stress keeps hitting me continually like a sudden never-ending rainfall. I thought it was cyclical but not. Recently it has lasted for nearly a month and it's driving me mad. It has lasted for too fucking long.  And I scarcely control my anger or maintain my composure toward anyone. I can not hold my ego down like I used to be able o...

12/8/2023-Mimi’s diary: sao vẫn không làm rõ được mình?

 Mình nói mình muốn tập trung mà, vậy mình tập trung vào cái gì? Tập trung vào cách vận hành và phát triển một tổ chức, đúng không? Nghe này, mình muốn ngành địa chất. Vậy thì mình phải biết là mình cần chuyên môn.  Mình chọn học bổng leadership, ví dụ như chevening Vậy MediaAC cần gì?  Mediaac cần người làm thư viện, bảo tồn cho các tác phẩm nghệ thuật  Mình cần học một ngành giúp mình ứng dụng IT Ngành nào cũng cần ứng dụng IT. Mình muốn làm giáo dục, vậy thì mình cần một công cụ. Công cụ tốt nhất mà mình có là ngành địa chất  Vậy tại sao mình không tập trung vào ngành đó? Ngành: đi làm  Đi học master thì liên quan gì đến việc đi làm? Đi học tiếp thêm kiến thức mới để đóng góp vào sự phát triển của nơi làm việc, mở rộng quan hệ quốc tế, mở rộng thị trường Vậy sao mình vẫn mắc kẹt với marketing? Marketing là tools kiếm tiền, cũng giống ngoại ngữ và tin học vậy. Đừng để nó lấn chiếm mình. Bạn chắc chưa? Bạn cần hiểu 2 vấn đề: đi học và đi làm Khi bạn muốn l...

MY WORK HISTORY

  MY WORK HISTORY  According to the to-do list that I made some days before, the second entry below that of taking the IELTS test is job hunting , that's the reason why I write about this topic today.  In this post, I'm going to write about my childhood dreams, jobs that I used to experience in the past and my career aspiration for a better future.  My childhood dreams I'm nothing special. At least that is what I have realized at the age of 26, but winding the timeline back nearly 20 years, I really knew nothing, I didn't see the truths about us, humans, about how tiny we are compared to the universe. I thought I was special and unique and I would become someone important some days, someone really really great. I had dreamed of becoming a prime minister, a writer, a journalist or an English teacher. I did make it in some fields and still, what I haven't achieved gradually diminished along with the devastation that the adult world has caused to me.  My choices An...